Are you an "I can" or an "I will" person?

I just downloaded a song from iTUNES called “I Will” sung by a group called Men of Standard. (Great group by the way). There is a line in there that basically says to stop being an “I can” person and be an “I will” person. About two and a half years ago I was diagnosed with an eye condition called Scleritis. It is an inflammation of the white part of my left eye. Thirty doctors and mega doses of prednisone and other various drugs later I am still dealing with this disease. I take about 25 pills a day and have a regular date with the Arthritis clinic once a month to get a Remicade treatment to try and stop my body from eating my eye away. I have never known physical or emotional pain like this ever in my life. I was the kind of person that if I had a headache I would never take pills of any kind and would go lay down for an hour and be fine. The best way I can describe my eye pain at its worst is if you take a grape representing an eyeball and peel the skin off of it. It has not been fun. I have dealt with serious thoughts of suicide over the past couple of years as well as losing my job because of not being able to be a youth pastor and hang out with kids. The inflammation got so bad that I developed a partially detached retina as well. I guess the most frustrating thing is that no doctor can tell me what is causing this condition even after being seen by thirty doctors. The last conversation with my eye doctor was about how we have one more drug that we can try and if it doesn’t work that I need to consider letting the eye die or going on some sort of Chemotherapy. Not really things you want to think about when you are 34 years old or really any time of your life. Ok, back to my downloading the song “I Will”. On the roller coaster ride known as my life right now, I have a decision to make every day I wake up and look out of an eye that has vision loss and never feels the same two days in a row to make each day that God gives me a positive or negative experience. I can choose to be an “I can” person and just know in my mind that I can get through this with the help of God and through the Bible saying “yes, I know I can be an overcomer in Christ” or I can choose to be an “I will” person and put actions behind my knowledge of what I am able to do. It’s funny how different the words “can” and “will” are. One speaks to ability while the other speaks to engaging that ability. If I have a $50 dollar bill in my pocket I will never understand its ability until I spend it. Just because I don’t spend it doesn’t reduce its value but its value cannot be seen until it’s spent. It really is the same thing with our lives. God sees value in us and knows our ability. Unless I am willing to be “spent” and search for God and work on developing who God wants me to be through my struggles, the ability inside of me can never be seen. I know that the devil wants me to blame God and only look at how bad my life is right now with medical bills and crappy physical health, but I need to listen to Jesus and what he tells me. I am an overcomer in Christ and have the ABILITY to overcome the enemy with tools that God has given me. God’s part is done as far as the strength he has given me, now it’s my decision to be the “I will” person and overcome the devil by choosing to live a life of victory instead of defeat.